Are Bottlenecks Clogging Your Sales?

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Guest Post By Michel Fortin

michel fortinWhen a sales page is not performing up to your expectations, the worst thing you can do is nothing.

In most circumstances, there are steps you can take to alter the copy to improve your results immediately. By taking action and making changes, you can strengthen your copy quickly and improve your sales conversions.

The key to this process is testing to boost your outcome.

However, when most people start testing their sales copy, they immediately think of something they can add or tweak. Or they’re confused as to what to test, particularly what to test first.

I’ve found that the best and most efficient element to test is to actually first remove the things that are stopping people from ordering. In other words…

Bottlenecks.

Sales copy is a greased slide that should take the reader almost seamlessly and painlessly from the moment they see your copy to the completion of their order. The easier it is to read and take action, the more sales you will make.

Anything that blocks or stops this greased-slide process should be eliminated. And you know what the biggest bottleneck in copy is?

Before I tell you, first let’s cover a few things.

The Power of Split-Testing
Of course, you’ll want to ensure your testing is as accurate as possible by tracking your conversions from unique views, returning visitors, and email referrals separately.

If you want to implement all your changes at once, or if you want to test multiple variables at the same time, you need to take advantage of multivariate testing.

Multivariate testing allows you to test multiple aspects of your copy, simultaneously, while determining which variables as well as the best combinations get the highest response.

(I use Google Website Optimizer almost exclusively now, and I recommend it.)

Your first step in improving conversion may be to review the sales page and eliminate any visual embellishments or distractions, including any oversized graphics or flourishes.

You’ll find that eliminating potential distractions from the reading process to the decision making process will increase conversion. Once you’ve trimmed the excess that may be impeding your results, you can begin to focus on the copy.

There are three major bottlenecks common in sales letters that you will want to experiment with and focus your efforts on. They are, in order:

  • The headline
  • The process
  • The offer

As one of the vital factors in your copy, much has been written about the creation of a strong headline. It must be powerful enough to be compelling to the reader.

But the logic is simple: if people don’t read past your headline, they won’t take action no matter how good your copy or product is. And the headline is often if not always the biggest bottleneck in copy.

Some of my marketing clients have improved their sales from 20% to 700% by simply changing and testing the headline. (In some cases, it was as simple as adding or removing a few words.)

This brings me to an important discussion.

Don’t Make Assumptions
Recently, a coaching client of mine asked me for my opinion on a post from James Brausch’s blog, where James submits that the headline is not the most important part of a salesletter.

Now, I understand the message James is trying to convey. He makes a valid point. But some people might misinterpret his findings and conclude that headlines are not important. So let me take a moment to clarify a few things.

James purports that headlines are not the most important elements of sales copy because of two logical arguments:

James tested headlines, and “nothingness” (that is, no headline) as a variable has increased response in some cases.
The order link is the most important element because, while sales copy can still work without a headline, it certainly can’t without an order link.

First off, James’ premise is right. Because his argument relates to actual, bottom line results. Are headlines directly tied to creating actual sales? The answer, of course, is no. But order links definitely are.

(By the way, in recent tests based on an idea I got from my friend Armand Morin, I found that a simple, old-fashioned gray submit button outperformed a graphic one by 62%, even over traditional order links.)

But a headline is the most important part of the salescopy, not because it is directly tied to sales but because it is indirectly tied to the sales process.

To the “greased slide,” in other words.

It’s all about fundamental marketing: the famous AIDA formula (which means “Attention,” “Interest,” “Desire,” and “Action”). The first part of the formula is the most critical element, because you first need to grab people’s attention.

If you don’t, the rest of the formula fails.

The Real Purpose of a Headline
Consequently, the headline is meant to help capture your readers’ attention.

The primary objective and purpose of a headline is one thing and one thing only: to get people to start reading the next paragraph. And the next paragraph’s job is to get people to read the second one. And so on.

Simply because “nothingness” wins in some cases doesn’t mean using a headline doesn’t work or that it’s safe to conclude that the headline is not the most important part of the salesletter.

Coming to that conclusion is premature and misleading. (It’s a correlation, not a cause. There is a difference, and I’ll come back to this in a moment.)

First of all, there are many other variables here that are not taken into account:

For one, the first paragraph — in a no-headline letter — can act as a headline. Or any graphics (with copy on them), pop-ups, even the web page title (i.e., the text in the top browser bar) can work. Who knows?

The mindset of the reader may be “presold” before hitting the copy — such as coming from an affiliate promotion or other website. They’ve probably captured the readers’ attention already.

If the traffic came from a PPC campaign, the ad (keywords and ad copy) acts like the headline. People read it and want more information. So if they hit a salesletter without a headline, they’re tempted to read it anyway.

Headlines can sometimes scream “salesletter!” And when people see one, they may be pushed to scan or leave the copy. Especially if the headline has the tell-tale signs: red color, overexaggerated claims, or unnecessary bloat (such as wordy headlines that are needlessly long).

Finally but most importantly, they may not be targeted at all. Untargeted traffic is often the biggest reason for copy to fail. But if they are targeted, a headline may push them away. (Better said, a poor headline will.)

Bad Headlines Are Bottlenecks
Again, the biggest bottleneck in any copy is almost always the headline. Because if people can’t read past it, they won’t read the rest. If you don’t get their attention (the “A” in AIDA), then the rest of the formula falls down the drain — no matter how great the copy, the offer, or the product really is.

So removing a headline in some cases may be like removing the bottleneck.

As Dan Kennedy once said:

“The truth about long copy is that, first of all, there’s abundant, legitimate, statistical research, split-testing research, to indicate that virtually without exception (…) that readership falls off dramatically at 300 words but does not again drop off until 3,000 words.” — Dan Kennedy in a Tim Paulson Interview

In this case, Dan was talking about long copy in that, if people are targeted, they will read it. All of it. But if they’re not, they won’t even get passed the headline.

However, Dan’s assertion applies to headlines, too. In other words, if people are targeted and the headline is right for them (i.e., if they are targeted and the headline does grab their attention), they will read the rest.

But if they are not targeted, if the headline doesn’t grab their attention, or, even worse, if the headline is poor and actually pushes people away, then they will leave the moment they read the headline.

Naturally therefore, if the headline is poor (and all other headlines tested are poor, too), then “nothingness” can certainly win because you are in essence removing the bottleneck — but not necessarily the cause.

If a really good headline was found, it might win over “nothingness”. And I admit that, in some cases, finding the perfect headline might be a challenge. So removing the headline can be an obvious solution.

But it can also be the result of being too lazy to come up with better headlines, or not having enough traffic and/or time to test more headlines.

(My friend, top copywriter Brian Keith Voiles, often talks about writing 10, 20, even 100 headlines before settling on the one he likes. To that I would add, you should do the same to figure out which headlines to test, too.)

Causality Vs. Correlation
Now, let’s go back to something I mentioned earlier.

There is a difference between “causality” and “correlation”.

In plain English, the winner in a split-test may be relative. The variable in itself may not have been the cause. It may have won because other variables tested weren’t good enough to produce a better result.

If “nothing” was used as a variable and won, it is possible that it was because the element tested was redundant and unnecessary. But more than likely, it may have been because all other variables tested were bottlenecks.

In this particular case, I believe that removing the headline was not what caused a salesletter to outperform. It was simply the lack of a bottleneck that led to the copy outperforming with “nothingness” in the end.

Specifically, the other headlines it was pitted against were either not the right ones for that market or they were poor headlines to begin with.

But coming to the conclusion that removing the headline — any headline — is the cause of your sales copy’s boost in response is premature.

For example, if you drink orange juice every day and you don’t have cancer, does that mean that drinking orange juice cures or prevents cancer?

Obviously, that’s an assumptive leap, and it’s wrong. There may be a correlation there, but it’s not the cause. You need to conduct more tests, dig deeper, and add more variables into the mix to determine the cause.

And that’s the case, here.

No headline winning over other headlines doesn’t mean that the lack of a headline caused the copy to pull more. It may simply be that “no headline”, in relation to all the other headlines it was tested against, won because the other headlines were poor or weren’t right for that market.

So removing the headline simply removed the bottleneck.

But it’s also safe to say that, if you were to test more headlines, there would be one out there that could outperform “nothingness” as well.

Now, I’m neither a mathematician or statistician, nor do I pretend to be one. But I do know that it’s often best to conduct more tests to determine the cause. (Or, in this case, come up with more headlines to test with.)

Find The Right Mix
You will want to test several approaches to determine what tests best for your market. You will only find the right mix through testing the elements individually and collectively.

(That’s the power of multivariate testing.)

Other than headlines, the ordering process and the offer are usually the next biggest bottlenecks. They can create friction, lower buyer confidence, and invite procrastination.

A more forward call to action may be what your product needs to overcome buyer hesitation and push them along the order. Or the order form may be too confusing, too difficult to understand, or too cumbersome to process.

(In many tests we’ve discovered that, the easier you make it for your prospects to order from you, the greater the response will be. Often, the bump in response is significantly greater.)

Once you’ve removed the friction in the ordering process, next up is the offer. There are three components to the offer you will want to experiment with. They are:

  • Prices
  • Premiums
  • Proof Elements

People often start by testing the price. Without question, pricing should definitely be tested.
But until you’ve removed the other bottlenecks, you won’t know whether a higher price point will increase sales or a lower one will.

Also, when most people test premiums with their offers, they tend to do so by adding more.

While alternative premiums may be more appealing, offering too many bonuses — or simply offering some in the first place — may be a deterrent.

Fear is a Bottleneck, Too
The next step is increase the strength of your claims through internal cues and external sources. Because your credibility or lack thereof is a major bottleneck too. Better said, people’s inherent fear and distrust in you is a major bottleneck.

It all boils down to establishing trust.

Anything you can add to establish credibility and reduce their fear in buying from you will both strengthen your claims and ultimately increase your conversions.

Testimonials, case studies, screenshots, tours, guarantees, samples, and photos (including sample covers, product shots, and even packaging) are examples of internal proofs that you can add and test.

External elements may include statistics, seals of approval, credit card logos, third-party indicia (such as Trust Guard), and other safety features will demonstrate security, increasing the perception of integrity.

(By the way, I personally know Scott Brandley, the CEO of Trust Guard. My clients have used Trust Guard successfully, and I highly recommend them.)

Once you are confident in your offer, you’ll want to experiment with more and varied “reasons why”. You have an opportunity to increase the perceived value of the product by explaining the reasons why behind the purchase.

Lacking a good, solid reason why is another huge bottleneck.

Pumping up the story behind the product and the offer can give your copy more legs. If your product is undervalued for the selling price, establish a compelling reason why the product is being made available at such a small price.

This is also where you will work on overcoming procrastination, and spelling out why the product is a “must-have” and “right-now” product for your audience.

By addressing these three areas (i.e., the headline, the process — the reading and ordering process — and the offer), you will eliminate many bottlenecks in your copy and enable your visitors to move from interest to sale.

With adequate testing you can adjust your sales pitch quickly to ensure each change you make has a positive effect on sales producing immediate, measurable responses that can result in a stronger campaign.

— About Michel Fortin —
Michel Fortin is a direct response copywriter, marketing strategy consultant, and instrumental in some of the most lucrative online businesses and wildly successful marketing campaigns to ever hit the web. For more articles like this one, please visit his blog and subscribe to his RSS feed.

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